Mired Passion

aching
to lay down and hold you

aching
to press close and slide over you

aching
to feel wetness slick hot clingy

aching
to know you

aching
to whisper to you

devotions and divinations
prayers and promises

aching
to give you
all the things of a lover
sun, moon, stars
sands and oceans
mountains and valleys
vows, oaths
knightly deeds of courtship
Epic Bravery
Romantic Lust

Sweet Dreams which could
never survive reality

Sweet Dreams that pulse
in my brain
and drip from my pen

But twist as they leave my mouth
or fly over the keyboard

Tentative and fragile
awkward brick thoughts
without the will of youth
the innocence and eagerness
or the blind foolish faith

Is this what you want?
plagues my every Sweet Dream
words that flew off my tongue in youth
find no easy release ten years later

I would not go back but cannot go forward
no past
no future
and a very uncertain present

Lust equaled Love for ten years
and it was not enough

Break my heart or save me
It's not your job
Whatever ache moves me
is mine to wade through
no past
no future
and only a very uncertain present

all faced alone
even as I ask for solace and distraction
not knowing what I can offer in return
except fumbling and kisses
and a mired passion

2:04 am cdt, 2.26.2009